A Frustration

Am I due for another rant yet?  I feel one coming on. 

How do you deal with things?  Do you confront issues head-on, or do you have a tendency to let things fester for the sake of a sense of "peace"?

I have a frustration that has been brewing for a few years among my own colleagues.  Too many ministers today can be said to be "non-confrontational." I've been watching as large churches and small churches refuse to move forward because the issues that are holding them back are not being confronted.  I'm listening to stories of friends and family that are considering finding a new church because their pastor won't stand up for them or their needs.  I'm witnessing staff members who limit ministry to their own abilities because their senior pastor won't push them to be more.

God, I pray that I don't become that insensitive and impotent.

Don't get me wrong, confrontation is hard.  It will give you the same sensation of trying to ask out a girl at age 12.  You get a pit in your stomach, break out in a cold sweat, your vision may blur, and you may feel like puking, and when it's all over you may not remember everything you said, but you know that it's something that needs to be done.  Confrontation is about justice.  Without justice, I believe that true peace is something you can't find.

BUT - the unwillingness to confront people is often justified by a minister's desire to keep the peace.  Let's take a step back and observe what happens...

I watch as a church member gets trampled by others.  Maybe they come to me, seeking my support.  I show concern, but refuse to act - what happens?  That church member loses confidence in me and possibly his or her church.  The perpetrators are allowed to continue in harmful ways and we become something other than the church God wills us to be.  Now, on the surface, it may look calm and peaceful, but underneath, people are harboring ill feelings, plotting revenge, and considering ways that they may exploit others to increase their own kingdoms.

Is it worth it?

I just heard a story this week of a family member who is considering leaving her church for another because one of my colleagues refuses to take corrective measures with a staff member.  Last week, it was another colleague telling me that he's relied on as an associate pastor to make all the confrontations for the senior pastor because the senior is unwilling.  Years ago, it was watching certain church members manipulate an entire church staff because there was no accountability from the senior pastor.  Before that, it was an entire staff leaving and a large number of members walking out the door because the senior pastor was an enabler to those with selfish ambition.

These kinds of stories hurt.  This is not the picture of what a church should be.  While we are a place that embraces all people and nurtures them, an important piece of that is accountability.  Yes, I know that not all battles are worth fighting and no, none of us should charge into a situation blindly and with unnecessary force.  However, when there is injustice, oppression, or exploitation, our action should be swift and sure.  If we as pastors (shepherds) are unable to protect the flock, then who will? 

The answer is no one.